Friday, September 30, 2005

Silly poem

No matter what they say
No matter how we pray
Some things we just can't fix
Some things we just can't change.

I'm sorry for what I did
I'm sorry for how I said it
I'll see you at the end
Goodbye, dear friend.

Anyone who asks will be shot. I want to feel angsty for today, damnit!


Sex, Lies and Newspapers- A talk

Okay, what happened yesterday was an industry talk in college. The talk was given by the Crime Desk Editor, Tony Emmanuel, and it proved to be quite enlightening.

I shall touch on only one case here, mainly because I think it was a little dodgy (to quote my lecturer and Mr. Emmanuel) and because it's simply gleeful what he pointed out. I want to talk about the rest in my lecture commentary (which will be passed to Faridah next week... Hopefully).

The Noritta Samsuddin Case

Death by misadventure.

That was what he said. Think about it.

For those unfamiliar with the case (which should be non-Malaysians), Noritta Samsuddin was found dead in her room. It was quite likely that she had had sex before she died, and the signs pointed that the sex had elements of BDSM in it. Malaysia is a conservative community, no matter what else we say. A case like this is bound to get the public's attention, especially since Malaysians are a very busybody lot.

The DPP (Deputy Public Prosecutor) was trying to prove that Noritta was murdered. The coroner though (I think it was him) did not want to say that because he was not sure. He said that Noritta died because she choked to death (I am too lazy to spell the scientific term, though I do know how to pronounce it).

There were no real signs to prove that she was murdered though. Just to point it out to you.

More later after I edit. *Sleeps*

If you wanted to hear what I sounded like

When I'm passionate about something, go below.

It's episode 8.

Too lazy to format.

Yuutsu na Seven Days

Is one of the silliest songs I've ever heard. Worse than Le Crazee Frog.

Fun though.

It is Friday.


Silly pieces

Silly little poetry that proves just why I should never attempt them.

To err is human, to forgive, Divine.
For each broken heart I'd offer mine.

For every heart that's sincere
There's more that're false
But to withold it for fear
Your opportunity will pass.

So open your eyes and reach out your hand
I promise you to catch you, dearest friend.


For every seed sown
For every flower blown
To each I offer a prayer
May you not become bitter.

Whenever you open your eyes
Look through all the lies
Trust in the Hand that's led you here
The one that holds you dear.

For the human heart may fail
For the spirit may quail
But should you choose resign
That would be a bigger crime.

Choices made, choices undone
Too many have chosen to run
But more have chosen to stay and fight
Finding solace in might.

But might is not all there is
In fact it is the least.
To all my friends, here's a toast
Thank you for making it through this post.

Silly me.

Lyric mania!

Taken from:
(J-Pop) Utada Hikaru: Sakura DORAPPUSU (Sakura Drops)

11th Single

Koi wo shite owari wo tsuge
Chikau koto wa kore ga saigo no HEARTBREAK
Sakura sae kaze no naka de
Yurete yagate hana wo sakasu yo
Falling in love, saying goodbye[1]
With a vow that this is the last heartbreak
Even the cherry tree, swaying in the wind
Will eventually blossom

Furidashita natsu no ame ga
Namida no yoko wo tootta sutto
Omoide to DABURU eizou
Aki no DORAMA no saihousou
The summer rain that started to fall
gently streaked past my tears
Images that resemble memories
Autumn's drama reruns

Doushite onaji you na PANCHI
Nando mo kuracchaun da
Sore demo mata tatakaun darou
Sore ga inochi no fushigi
Why have I suffered
Almost the same blows such countless times?
But even so, I'll probably fight again
That is one of life’s mysteries

Koi wo shite subete sasage
Negau koto wa kore ga saigo no HEARTBREAK
Sakura sae toki no naka de
Yurete yagate hana wo sakasu yo
Falling in love, giving it everything
With a wish that this is the last heartbreak
Even the cherry tree, swaying through time
Will eventually blossom

Kurikaesu kisetsu no naka de
Kutsu ga surihetteku motto
In the revolving seasons
My shoes are wearing out, more and more

Kata no chikara nuite
Kako wa dokoka ni shimatte oke
Koko kara sou tookunai darou
Mita koto mo nai keshiki
Let go the tension in your shoulders
So you can seal away the past somewhere
From here they're probably not too far
Sceneries you haven’t even seen

Tomaranai mune no itami
Koete motto kimi ni chikazukitai yo
Hitomawari shite wa modori
Aoi sora wo zutto tesaguri
I want to overcome the ceaseless pain in my chest
And become closer to you
I have wandered about once and returned[2]
Always grasping for the blue sky

Koi wo shite owari wo tsuge
Chikau koto wa kyou ga saisho no GOOD DAY
Sakura made kaze no naka de
Yurete sotto kimi ni te wo nobasu yo
Falling in love, saying goodbye
With a vow that today's the first good day
Everything, even the cherry tree, swaying in the wind
Softly reaches out toward you

Suki de suki de dou shiyou mo nai
Sore to kore to wa kankei nai
I love you I love you, it can't be helped
That has nothing to do with this

Contributed by myfinalf8heaven

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Bokutachi no Yukue

Found it. Love this song.

Bokutachi no Yukue
Lyrics: Yuta Nakano+shungo
Compose: Yuta Nakano
Vocal: Hitomi Takahashi

bokutachi wa mayoinagara
tadoritsuku basho wo sagashitsudzuke
kanashikute namida nagashitemo
itsuka kagayaki ni kaete...

tozashita kako ga ima mune wo yusaburu kara
motomeru hodo tooku okizari no kokoro
bokura wa ikiru hodo nanika wo ushinatte
soredemo ashita eno yume wo sutetakunai

kanashimi no riyuu de sae mo tsuyoku dakishimeteitai
toorisugita kisetsu no sono saki ni nani ga aru no darou

bokutachi wa mayoinagara
tadoritsuku basho wo sagashitsudzuke
kanashikute namida nagashitemo
itsuka kagayaki ni kaete
'Cause I'm Never Gonna Stop Streakin' My Dream

dareka no yasashisa ni senaka wo muketa nowa
sabishisa sore sae mo tsuyosa ni shitakute
deai to onaji kazu wakare ga aru no nara
futatabi aeru hi wo bokura wa shinjiyou

subete ni kakusareta imi wo hitotsu hitotsu mitsuketai
bukiyou sugita ano hi no sayonara mo wakariaeru darou

bokutachi wa kawatteyuku
yume mo kokoro mo mitekita keredo
doregurai toki ga nagaretemo
kawaranai omoi ga aru
'Cause I'm Never Gonna Stop Streakin' My Dream

mayottemo toomawari shitemo soko ni dake aru nanika ni
kidzuita nara hashiridaseru

bokutachi wa mayoinagara
tadoritsuku basho wo sagashitsudzuke
kanashikute namida nagashitemo
itsuka kagayaki ni kaete
'Cause I'm Never Gonna Stop Streakin' My Dream

We continue to search for our destination,
Even as we lose our way.
Though tears may flow with our sadness,
They will shine with radiance someday.

The sealed past is starting to stir in my chest,
The forgotten heart goes further each time I wish for it.
The longer we live, the more we lose,
But even so I don't want to throw away my dreams for tomorrow.

I want to embrace even the reasons for our sadness.
I wonder what lies before us as the seasons pass.

We continue to search for our destination,
Even as we lose our way.
Though tears may flow with our sadness,
They will shine with radiance someday.
'Cause I'm Never Gonna Stop Streakin' My Dream

By turning our backs to the kindness of others,
We try to change even solitude into our strength.
If there are as many farewells as encounters,
Let us believe in the day when we will meet once more.

One by one, I want to find the concealed meanings of everything.
Then we will understand each other's reasons for that awkward goodbye.

We are going to change,
Though we've started to sense dreams and hearts.
No matter how much time flows by,
There are some feelings that will not change.
'Cause I'm Never Gonna Stop Streakin' My Dream

We are lost and taking detours,
But if we take notice of the things that only exist at our destination,
We will be able to take off running.

We continue to search for our destination,
Even as we lose our way.
Though tears may flow with our sadness,
They will shine with radiance someday.
'Cause I'm Never Gonna Stop Streakin' My Dream

Of Sex, Lies and Newspapers

Keep your eyes on this place. I'm too lazy to write it out now. :p

Listening to the podcast

*Hangs head down*

Oh. My God.

*Ded of laughter*


Someone told me about this. I just spread it.

No spam, I promise!



Soundscape is DONE!!

But it's a huge file! 50MB????

EDIT: It's in a Quicktime format, mainly because I transferred it from a Mac.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Another amazing thing....

Is just how much my dad screws up the computer and then blames my brother and me.

.... Thank god you taught me Mousekeys, Viceice.

*Hangs a note*

Out to editing. Will be back after Thursday...

I hope.


This be the freaky

ColorQuiz.comMistressNaoko took the free personality test!

"Needs a way of escape from all that oppresses her ..."

Click here to read the rest of the results.

Silly meme

Stolen from Serge. Pictures will be up at the beginning of NEXT week, BTW, ppl! I need to get through my assignments first! c:p (Now that's a silly emoticon!)

I was the girl who chased boys around for calling me plump. Now they chase me.

I was the girl who couldn't wait to go to school because my cousins were. Now I can't wait to graduate.

I was the girl who was rejected because I was too forward with my feelings. Now I'm not rejected, but I do feel a little uncomfortable when people do that to me.

I was the girl who hated reading and writing when I was in kindergarten because they forced me to. Now it's my life's blood.

I was the girl who let you go because I didn't want to cage you. I now have a friend I'm proud of.

I was the girl who cried because I was bullied. I now hide it inside.

I was the girl who hated wearing skirts. I still do.

I'm the girl who didn't like being feminine. I still don't.

I'm the girl who has not changed nor matured in the past two years. I hope I never will.


Pretty sight in the sky

The sky was dark

The clouds were grey

Yet through it all it was clear

When the sunlight streamed through the sky

That every hope, every prayer was heard

And every cry was answered.

An open letter

An open letter to a friend of mine. You know who you are. Shut up, read, and if you still consider yourself my friend, drop me a line. By email, SMS, I don't care. If you don't, at least have the courtesy to tell me anyway.

Dear friend whom I would like to name but won't due to privacy concerns (and the reason why I deleted your comment),

When I said that once I give my loyalty to someone, I meant it. If I consider you my friend, there's nearly next to nothing that will make me change my mind, short of betrayal. This means that even if you are angsty, I don't care. It's one thing if I know why you're angsty. It's quite another when I don't. Either way, doesn’t change the fact that I still consider you my friend.

As cliche as it sounds, communication is the best way to keep friendships going. I'd appreciate it if you tell me why you're angsty. Note though, that this behaviour of yours has been going on for two months now. I'm counting from the time in late June, I believe. You have been angsty since then, and most of us (not only me) are pissed off by that. You have not told any of us why you are angsty, and you seem to think that it is your right to be so. Fine, it is, but you do not have the right to drag everyone else down with you. However, that is merely a reference.

I admit that most of the time, I do more talking than I should. I should be listening more than I should be yakking away. That doesn't mean that you can't stop me. There are not many people that I give permission to tell me to STFU. I do not tolerate rudeness to a certain extent, and you should know damn well by now that I give very few permission to be rude to me. Bee and you are two such people. Only a few friends, and those I consider to be close to my heart have that priviledge.

So you've stumbled in life. You've fallen. Who hasn't? We've all got bruised knees and hearts. You admitted that you were still a boy. Then GROW UP! The heartache isn't going to go away anytime soon. (Or it will, depending on how you look at it). Did you think I had it easy when I broke up with my ex?

It wasn't.

Knowing that he was going to be in the arms of another girl, that I couldn't hold him anymore, that I lost the man whom I thought I was going to be with forever, THAT HURT! Every time I see him, my heart bled a little. It still does to an extent. Till today I'm still not sure whether I'm over him, but I've chosen to make the best of what I can. I picked myself up, dusted my knees, and began walking again. I wasn't going to bring in emotional baggage if I could. But if you found someone to help you carry them and then throw them (the baggage) off a cliff, isn't that a joyous occasion? I’ll put it in simple terms; part of the reason why I got together with him was because he was prepared for my emotional baggage. He accepted it. As selfish as it may sound, it was not something that I want to lay on you.

What I really am angry about is the fact that you chose NOT to tell me about this. That is all, really. You're behaving like a small kid who has been rejected (which is a very bad metaphor, but it serves in this case) and is now throwing a tantrum. I'd have no problems if the issue was with me, but you've chosen to let it spill over to places and people that aren't really involved. That's what pisses me off. It's unbecoming of you and it's quite unprofessional.

Like I said before, there were times when I considered you a man. You're not immature, you're just a coward. And no matter what people say, it's easier to fight cowardice than it is to fight immaturity. I should know, I've been through that school.

By that same token, I'm not going to stop being friends with you simply because you've been angsty the past few weeks. Like I said, so what? You're still my friend. We're humans. None of us are perfect. Just because you're angsty, you thought I wanted to stop being your friend? Please! It seems like you're the one who doesn't know me well enough.

If this letter causes you even more hurt, then I am sorry. However, buang yang keruh, ambil yang jernih. Good night.


PS: If this seems too angsty for you, it's because I wrote this at night. When I was about to sleep. Gomen.

Comments have been disabled because I said so. If you want to comment, I have a saybox for a reason, ppl! :p Sorry if I seem curt, guys. We now return to your regularly-scheduled dose of insanity.

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

It's seriously amazing...

The amount of length some people would go to to avoid me.

Seriously, if you do not want to be friends anymore, don't want to acknowledge me, then at least have the guts to say it to my face. Or drop me a line. OR SOMETHING!

At least I told you when it happened. And I tried to talk to you. And sent you messages. TO WHICH YOU NEVER REPLIED.

So maybe I should have let you cooled down some more. Honestly though, if you don't want to have anything to do with me, THEN LET ME KNOW SO THAT I CAN STOP BEING FRIENDS WITH YOU.

The ball's in your court now.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Bloggers' Meet Update!

Okay, this is probably going to be posted on like a hundred different blogs (fine, about thirty or so!). This is basically what happened:

- We had someone recording a podcast. It is not up yet. Please put it up soon, Dzof!
- We got very passionate about sending Sashi up into space.
- Malaysian Idol. Daniel won. Emily and me were podcasted about that, though neither of us were big fans in the first place.
- There was a flashing competition between Serge and Fazri. The latter won.
- After that, they raped ramen. Picture is on Serge's blog, link above.
- Baby Jesse who is suing his dad, James, made an appearance. With the defendent in tow.
- Peter was Malaysianly fashionably late.
- Yvoone was there and was far more quiet than I thought she would be.
- Will post later as I think of them.

Photos will come in a separate post and when I go through everyone's blog to get them. Credit will be given, mainly because I had no digicam myself. Ja!

*Works on her keyboard face*

Before the blogger's meetup post

Just finished shooting today. We went to SMK Bandar Baru Sri Petaling for shooting. Rather interesting, though tiring, especially after yesterday.

Still it was a good shot. I miss having Ti in our group though. That would have made it more fun.

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Why today???

I hate not being able to find things.


Saturday, September 24, 2005

Malaysian Idol

Daniel won.



Oh... kay

Alli, if you're reading this, I know now exactly what you meant about your sleeping patterns.

Apparently I worked up a bigger sleep debt than I thought.



Friday, September 23, 2005

The word of the day is

SPLANGST= When you've gone beyond WANGST.

And might I reiterate that this is NOT directed to anyone.

Thank you.

Nita's going to be dreaming tonight...

Of Paul Moss.

Excuse me while I laugh my head off and watch it roll on the floor.

Watching Malaysian Idol

This year's was quite bad.

Mediocre at best.


Nita, you rock.

Roslan. SHUT UP.


Today is Friday.

And submissions date. See you guys around.

Thursday, September 22, 2005

Tarot, P2, Formatted

Chapter 1. Your General Compatibility with Each Other

His Sun in Libra and Her Sun in Gemini

You have an excellent mental rapport, and you enjoy one another's intelligence, wit and style. <-- How very true.

He is very considerate, has a strong desire to please Her (or any partner) and will compromise readily. <-- Sayang, you don't always have to do this, you know.

He always sees numerous possibilities or desirable alternatives, and you both have trouble being decisive or making up your minds sometimes. <-- The man who makes the impossible possible.

His Moon in Capricorn and Her Moon in Scorpio

Both of you are quiet and you often don't express all that you are feeling, but the reasons for this are quite different in each of you. <-- Very True.

He tends to repress feelings, emotional needs, and the inner child who wants to play and to be taken care of. Practical matters, work and responsibilities take precedence over play and pleasure, and desires which are "too childish" or "unrealistic" are downplayed. He often keeps an emotional distance and will not get emotionally involved.

Frequently He seems impassive, unresponsive, or emotionally detached, and has a habit of taking life too seriously. Material security and success can become a substitute for emotional well-being and happiness. <-- I agree. ^_^

She, on the other hand, is intensely emotional, though very private and secretive about feelings. She is deep, complex, given to silent brooding, and often harbors unspoken feelings for a long time. Resentments, guilt and secret fears can build up to tremendous proportions if not shared and released. <--I’m ashamed to admit it, but it’s true.

Neither of you trusts others very readily, and you are both afraid of being vulnerable or not in control. <--Not too sure about this for him, but it is for me.

This can prevent you from opening up completely to one another. You are both capable of great depth, fidelity, and constancy in a relationship, and neither of you is superficial emotionally. For this reason you can be harmonious together. <--Really? I hope so.

Mercury & Uranus conjunct or hard for Her, soft for Him

Both of you have inspired minds and are always open to new angles, novel or experimental ideas, alternative approaches.

She is more of a radical, however, and is frequently impatient and contrary to anything which impedes change and progress. She feels compelled to wake people up a bit and doesn't mind startling or even outraging others from time to time. <-- Heh… Guilty as charged.

He, on the other hand, integrates new ideas without necessarily rejecting the old and traditional, or offending more conservative people. While both of you are interested in stimulating fresh ideas and approaches, He communicates these ideas with more tact and smoothness - something She could learn from Him. <-- Teach me, dear?

Mars & Jupiter hard for Him, conjunct or soft for Her

Both of you have an abundance of energy along with an enterprising spirit, a love of challenges, and big dreams and the drive to accomplish them. But He is a bit foolhardy and overconfident at times, and may take unnecessary risks, whereas She has a fortuitous sense of timing. She is less likely to encounter problems due to haste, impatience, over-eagerness, and/or not accepting limitations. From her, He could learn to flow rather than to force or try to conquer every obstacle.


Falls in sheets, covering the ground.

Refreshes the air, and cleanses the spirit.

Washes away pain, cleans the slate.

Soothes the heart, and slumbers the mind.

A silly little rant/post/whatever

I was talking to a friend today who took back the AC for a bit to make a few copies (she passing me one later on) and something came up. Why are all the cute guys on the evil side? Okay, I have to admit that I tend to like guys who seem to be too good to be true, but these are people, who, in the end, have a dark side to them. (You know who you are. Both of you, so hush!)

However, that's not the point of this post. What is the point? There has been a recent trend in the media to make evil "look cool." We see it everywhere. The villain, though he loses, is always cool. He always looks good, always looks bishie and jaw-dropping, is sometimes angsty, but almost always there's the aura about him that you like. Or want.

Examples: Sephiroth, Dokugakuji, Sensui, etc. Okay, so most of them are from anime.

Thing is, even if there weren't, evil seems to be in. It seems to be cool.

And people wonder why morals is going down the drain.


Working with the macs

When all I really need is a PC with MS Word in it. At this point I'd even take Open Office, but no such luck. t_t

Yesterday's events

Yes, it seems like I'm really getting boring, aren't I? Can't even think of a decent title.

Yesterday was the first time I sat in a car with a male who drove less than 80kmph. In fact, he was barely touching 70 most of the time. It was refreshing, to say the least.

Ti, my parents do not know about Serge. I'd like to keep it that way. I got both your postcards, BTW. THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!!! *HUGS*

Wednesday, September 21, 2005


Am I the only one amused that a year after Gmail has done it, Yahoo is finally adding features similar to it?

Seriously hilarious for AC fans


Yes, I'm too lazy to format.

So... cold...

The lab is so cold my fingers are numb. Heading off to another lab now.

Found it!

I wonder what's up with Google. Found the lyrics that I wanted in an odd way. Oh well, here they are, though it's the TV version, so it's quite short. Taken from here

Kinya Kotani - Blaze
Tsubasa Chronicle Opening Song (TV size)

Hatenaki yume motomeru shirubenaki sekai de...

Kasanaru omoi kokoro tsukisasu kodou
Shizuka ni tsuzuku tameraimonai uta

Tooku sora no kanata kara nazariatta bokura no kage
Hitsuzen to kimagure no naka shirusareta kioku

Surechigatta toki no uzu
Kuchihatetemo kimi no koe wo shinjite

Hatenaki yume motomeru shirubenaki mirai de
Boku ga hikari nakushitemo itsuka

Kimi ga tomoshitekureta kirameku mune no honoo
Tsubasa ni kawaru kibou no kakera

by Tofusensei of #Live-eviL

Out seeking our limitless dreams without any clue where to look...

Innumerable emotions piercing our racing hearts,
Our ballad continues on quietly without hesitation.

Our shadows blended in from the far egde of the sky,
We take forth these memories, somewhere between whim and inevitability.

Even if this whirlpool of time we've come across falters,
I'll trust your voice.

Out seeking our limitless dreams without any clue where to look...
I know that even if I lost the light, someday...

...there will be the flame you've lit for me within your sparkling heart;
and we'll trade these fragments of our dreams for wings.

Listie, part 2

In this case, list of things to do:

1. Faridah likes the angle I'm taking. Now to draft out questions and the people to talk to.

2. I need to call the Shah Alam Church and the Selangor Land office.

3. Need to get more details from Finance about the RM1 coin.

4. Earrings have been bought. From Pasar Malam. Trying a pair out today.

5. Clothes will be bought later, probably this weekend, if I get the time.

*Compares list* Damn.

Looking for: Lyrics to Blaze, by Kinya Kotani.

*Yawns, rubs tummy, and turns over*

No one should EVER have to get up this early. Seriously.

I did this two weeks ago for shooting. Now I'm doing it again because I'm lazy to drive. *Yawns*

Seriously, I'm very sleepy.

*Falls on keyboard*

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

A conspiracy theory

That has no weight whatsoever in real life at all. If you take what I say here and treat it as though it was factual when it isn't, you are asking for trouble. If, however, you are taking it as a jumping board to more research, then I applaud you. Only the following has no basis whatsoever in reality other than my brain (and not even there at times- The Muses). /Disclaimer

The theory is simple:

Higher oil prices profits the US to an extent. The US controls Iraq, another source of oil. I believe that they may actually be stockpiling the oil to drive up prices. Why? I don't know. Like I said, this has no basis whatsoever and I'm simply venting.

Thank you for reading.

Something random

Before I start writing on the issue that's got me worked up this morning:

If you look closely at the letters "e" and "y" you can actually interchange them. For instance, curve the right stroke of the "y" over the left, twist the lower stroke, and you get the "e."

So holE and holY makes sense.


Monday, September 19, 2005

A quick rant

And one of the reasons I use my blog is to vent.

Apparently my dad was never told (despite the fact that I distinctly remember having the same conversationw ith him THREE TIMES) that I failed a subject and that I have to delay my graduation. I had the same convo with him three times. WTF?

At least unlike him, I'm trying to make plans. At least I'll have something to do during the hols (I hope). I don't really mind skipping Christmas this year just to spite them.

*Lets out huge sigh* I feel so much better now. We now return to your really cheerful and crazy usual Silly Pat.

Stuck in college

Again. Sigh. I hate LKW. The person.

I hate periods.

I hate the woman's monthly.

Thank you, Amanda and Beebs.

Working part 2

Things I discovered:

1. I realise why parents hate Play-Doh.

2. McDonald's a laxative.

3. Money is ALWAYS the good! (Paid in cash. WOOT!)

4. Sitting down after walking about for a long time and it being the first day of the monthlies is NOT good. (Ow...)


6. Despite the fact that I'm not that fit, I like doing physical/manual labor. The kind that you move stuff around.

7. In relation to (6), I like working with kids.

8. Apparently I'm not that bitchy even when it's the monthlies.

9. Picture of me with the company tattoo was taken. Will retrieve from Uncle later.

10. I realise why kids find clowns scary sometimes. In relation to that, there's just something WRONG when you see a long balloon being blown up.

Since Serge said we have to do this:

Seven Things Naoko Plans To Do Before She Dies
- visit the Vatican
- Write an enjoyable fiction/fantasy book
- Not to disappoint those who need me
- Always have enough for not just myself, but the people and causes I care about
- To be able to go through life with the sense and wonder of a child, yet with the maturity needed to understand the other adults
- Collect books, rare ones that give me mental orgasms (details on this later)
- Be with the one I love for eternity

7 Celebrity Crushes
- Orlando Bloom (sucker for pretty faces)
- Marion Zimmer Bradley (R.I.P.)
- Tolkien
- That's all I can think of for now.

7 Often Repeated WORDS/PHRASES
- Yo! How're you?
- What the..? (Followed by either: Hotel or Foxtrot)
- You're kidding me!
- *Headpalm/ facepalm*
- Oh crap. I knew I forgot something.
- God, why me?
- Hmm....

7 Physical Traits Naoko Looks For In the Opposite Sex
- Short hair, or well-kept long hair
- Dresses casually without looking scruffy
- No tummy that can be seen from the front (so gross!)
- Taller than me a little bit
- Well-built, or at least looks fit
- Will let you know when I think of them

Please take this if you can. Especially Viv and Lin. :p


List of things needed to be done/ buy/ etc:

i) College

a) Follow-up on Church interviews and talk to the Government department (get their numbers and call them, though for the Church I need to drop off an email first)

b) Research for group assignment for PR (though that can only begin on Tues because am waiting for the case study to be photocopied)

c) Research for bloggers' meetup, Qs to be drafted and ethics to be examined

d) Drop email off to Faridah about change in focus for article

e) Finish scriptwriting

f) Research the sound effects for Soundscape due next week- Put in reservations for camera this week as well from Linda

ii) Non-college related stuff

a) Buy earrings- studs or something smaller or lighter compared to the current earrings I'm wearing

b) Get some more tops and lingerie

c) Call up MPH to see if they will have openings during the Nov. hols

d) Invest a bit of my earnings in ASB if possible (one of the better things about being a bumi- *ish ashamed to admit it*)

e) Buy books if option b) does not work out

f) Start drafting for Nano. ^_^

That should do it.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Working again after such a long time...

My legs are aching, I realise why I don't like working with kids, and I have never felt more bored.

1. My knees are overused. Ow. Helping kids sitting on the floor to draw is hard on the knees.

2. I enjoy working with kids too much.

3. I hate the last 30 mins before going home when it's too early to pack up and yet too late to do anything.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Thank you Anita!

For those who wanted to see my earrings and part of my spectacles, this is what they look like. Thank you Anita for the picture!

Wake me up when September Ends

September 11 has come and gone. I did not mourn for the people who were killed. I did not know them, nor did I really care. This apathy stems not from my disillusionment with America, but is more of a case of, "Tak tahu, maka tak cinta," or in English, "How can you love something you don't know?"

There is something more heinous that happened though. Rape and murder, especially of innocents and civilians, is something I abhor. Today, on September 16, 1982, about 700-3,500 (depending on whose accounts you're listening to) Palestinians and Lebanese were murdered in refugee camps. No one seems to remember them nor care about that now.

I'm not going to talk about who's responsible for this, or who should take responsible or such. All I will say is that you should think carefully when you think about just one side of the story. Because at the heart of it all, we want to believe in absolutes so that the world does not change.

September is depressing.

In memory of all those who died in Sabra and Shatila Massacre.

Because a voice of sanity has to be recorded before it's too late...

Lunch was a tube of hazelnut paste with cocoa. You have been warned.


To Note to Muse

Dearest Sukina,

Worrying about my assignments is not YOUR job. Neither is worrying about what time is it. That's ANGELA'S job. I do not appreciate you waking me up after only four hours of sleep for you to remind me to do my assignments when you're not responsible for it. I especially do NOT appreciate you screaming through my head for that. I had the idea and I was writing it down. Did you HAVE to wake me up at that ungodly hour when I already have my alarm clock set and I keep to it?


(White text to explain the above rant at Sukina)

For those who don't know, this is the first time I've woken up cursing a muse BY NAME. I AM NOT PLEASED.

Proper Update

This is a proper update, in which I tell people what's been happening.

Passed up assignment, finished the synopsis in record time, handed it in, and realised that I'm probably going to get crucified in class in about one week's time for my assignment. On a good note, at least I don't have that class later today. The lecturer's mom is in Selayang Hospital for kidney failure, so I hope she gets better soon.

Next assignment due next week. Lucky I have the idea for it in my head now, but now I need to come up with another one for 241 (another module).

And the following post will be bitching, so please be warned. It is also in white text to spare you the angst.

Random Note before I run off to school

1. I finished my Script. WOOT!

2. I'm wearing drop earrings. This is the first time I've worn earrings after not wearing them for more than a year due to an ear infection. I couldn't find my stubs. *Sniffs*

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Back home

And blogged for the heck of it.

Okay, I'm off to take a shower.

Blogging about blogging

One of the biggest risks that most Asians face while blogging is the risk of being hauled up for posting comments that could be construed as seditious remarks. True, for many of us this seems fair, especially if the comments came from us. But what if they were not?

What if they were comments left by other people? People who think that because it's the Net, they can abuse it and be annonymous and get away with it? In the end, it's not them who get into trouble, it's the people on whose blog/site they posted that do.Can they be hauled up? Recent events have shown that they do. (Links to be posted when I'm feeling less lazy, promise!)

At the end of the day, though, it's up to the bloggers to regulate themselves. Think of yourselves as radio stations. You never know what someone's going to say, but if you suspect that it's unsavoury, cut them off. Freedom of speech does not mean freedom to abuse.

URLS to read:

About Peter Tan's Blog

From Kamigoroshi


I miss Serge. 'Nuff said.


**Yes, I stole this from Serge, but it involves most other Malaysians anyway**

To all Malaysian (well, mostly Klang Valley but what the heck) there will be a Midvalley Megamall Meetup 2 on the 25th of September, 2005. It will be at 3pm, meeting in the Oasis Food Court.

Although to be safe it's best to leave the house early, you guys know how MV is on weekends.


Wednesday, September 14, 2005

Of idiocy and sadness

So today on Gaia, I open up my PM box to realise that someone has sent me an email telling me just HOW to stop people from sending me spam. Excuse me, but during what point in our conversation that did you NOT get that the girl you're talking to knows her way around the Internet? Sounds like he's trying to pick up girls. Bleh.

A guy stabbed his gf in the abdomen, killing their unborn child and wounding her seriously. Stupid idiot. You could have always given the child up for adoption. Why didn't you use protection as well??? Baka.

That be it for the day.

Tuesday, September 13, 2005


Note to self: Never, EVER repeat what my relatives say to another relative. I can do without the stupidity and angst.

I be dolt.



According to the notice I saw at the Cafeteria Cashiers, they are no longer accepting RM1 coins because to exchange them would incur a loss for Finance.


The Government says that the coins are legal tender until the 7th of December. Failure to accept the coins BEFORE this date is considered illegal and they will be fined.

Damnit, must talk to Faridah and see how I can break this story.

Monday, September 12, 2005

Was it right of me?

Getting him involved with me? Since it'll entail him dealing with the stuff my family can throw at people.

And the fact that most of them are jerks.

*Ish feeling very unsure*

Oh gosh

I have been spending wayy too much time with Serge reading Serge's blog. Not that it's too bad a thing. I'm starting to leave lyrics in my blog. *Shifty eyes*

Selena- Dreaming of You...

Late at night when all the world is sleeping
I'd stay up and think of you
And I'd wish on a star
That somewhere you are thinking of me too

Cuz I'm dreaming of you tonight
Till tomorrow, I'll be holding you tight
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Then here in my room,
Dreaming about you and me

Wonder if you even see me
And I wonder if you know I'm there
If you looked in my eyes
Would you see what's inside?
Would you even care?

I just wanna hold you close
But so far, all I have are dreams of you
So, I wait for the day and the courage to say
How much I love you(Yes, I do)

I'll be dreaming of you tonight
Till tomorrow, I'll be holding you tight
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Then here in my room,
Dreaming about you and me

Ahhh...I can't stop dreaming of you
Ahhh...I can't stop dreamin

Late at night when all the world is sleeping
I'd stay up and think of you
And I still can't believe that you came up to me
And said, "I love you; I love you too"

Now I'm dreaming with you tonight
Till tomorrow, and for all of my life
And there's nowhere in the world I'd rather be
Then here in my room,
Dreaming with you endlessly...

Meme... From Serge

20 years Ago ,1985

One year old child, my first memory was of getting my granma to put my shoes on so that I could catch my elder cousin sister. When they told me that she was going to school and that I couldn't play with her, I burst into tears. My grandfather took the photo. I have it in my room... Somewhere.

10 years Ago ,1995
I was in Standard 5, was about 11 years old and was quite happy to be in the so-called best class. Was adjusting pretty well to puberty and was worried about not being able to enter the secondary school I wanted.

5 years Ago, 2000
Hmm... Was transferred to a new school because my dad didn't like my then boyfriend. Broke up with him in November, and was elected the Beauty Queen of the New School with the Class Clown. Interestingly, was also the year I hugged a guy not my relative nor boyfriend. The guy later became my BF anyways.

3 years Ago, 2002
In college, just finished Foundation, and started writing on Then BF came back from NZ and was happy. Lived with grandma at this time to take care of her.

1 year ago, 2004
Followed college's move to Cyberjaya. Hated it. Took part in the first MI auditions, didn't make it but had lots of fun. Met Tiara through Dennis.

This year, 2005
Broke up with BF after 4 years together, took up Role-Playing, finished off that GC and FTV Module, being pursued by 2 guys, really hung out with Ti, enjoyed her company, and got teased for forgetting people's name.

Next year, 2006
Graduate, get a job, try not to screw my life and friendships up, and keep the relationship going.

10 years from now, 2015
Have a happy life, publish at least one fictional book, and be surrounded with friends and family with NO DEBTS.

Take this?

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Quick note


For the rest, I'm off to my dad's best friend's wedding. See you guys!!!!Call me if you guys need anything!! :)

Friday, September 09, 2005

I'm just silly right now

Libra Midheaven

Your destiny will involve you in activities that draw on your strong sense of justice, your love of harmony and artistic talent. You are very adaptable, patient and persistent in working toward your goals. You may seem flexible, but you have an inner resolve that no one can make you change. <==How very true

You will follow no one; you go by your own rules, but in an unobtrusive way. You find the best way of doing things without bothering others or calling attention to yourself. You usually forget any slights or offenses you may receive, but could harbor resentments which may cause you to "get even" when you feel that you are in a position to do so. <== As much as I hate to dispute this, it's true.

Your inner world is very reserved and you always show a charming smile, a gentle and gracious manner, a soft voice and a humble attitude toward others. Diplomacy and personal charm are your best assets. <== Ask anyone who knows me, this is too true.

Your career choice could be one of the following professions: attorney, diplomat, judge, mediator, umpire, artist, fashion designer, cosmetologist, salesperson, barber, public relations (*Sheepish grin*) or any other profession where you would be in contact with the public.

Mars in 10th house

Whatever your profession, you will be very persistent, vigorous, active and dominant. You have executive qualities and finish quickly every project you start. You are a good leader and work hard to attain management positions with authority. You are very ambitious and may find some adversities in your professional path. These adversities will make you stronger instead of weaker. You will consider the goals you achieve with your own effort and tenacity very important. Among the possibilities for your profession are the military, engineering, mechanical work or any sport. <== I wish.

Saturn in 10th house

Throughout your life you accept countless responsibilities, have many ambitions and excellent business ability. Also, you are well organized and persist in achieving your goals. If the relationship with your father was positive, you will have the capacity and authority to handle and lead others, otherwise, you could undervalue your own efforts, feel insecure with your choices and may not accomplish your professional goals. You could do well in laborious occupations that require wisdom and evaluation, in administrative fields or those related to land. Whatever you choose, you are likely to remain with it for a long time. <== Sounds like a plan.

Pluto in 10th house

You have a great capacity to excel as a leader and to handle large groups of people. In order to achieve success, you will have to learn to be more patient and flexible, and to control your tendency to be tyrannical. It is likely that your professional life will be dedicated to producing changes and transformations in your environment, or to healing others through the fields of medicine or psychiatry, or to managing a large corporation. Whatever your profession, you are sure to attain a very authoritative position; people will either love you or hate you, but you never will be unnoticed. <== Damn.

Ruler of 10th house in 10th House

Your father's image will be very influential in your life; he may sometimes lend considerable support, and other times may inhibit and frustrate your initiatives. For that reason, it wouldn't be wise to work with your father. You accept responsibilities, have many ambitions and excellent business ability. You are organized and persevering. If the relationship with your father was positive, you will have the authority and ability to lead others; otherwise, you may undervalue your own efforts, feel insecure with your choices and may not accomplish your professional goals. Your greatest frustration will be the limitation of your personal freedom because of the many responsibilities you assume. <== I hate my dad.

You may also abandon your goals or feel that it is very difficult to achieve what you want.

Gaian Avie

Excuse the hyperness...

S Q U E E !!

The presentation for our first doc is OVER!!! Class is cancelled for the afternoon session and I have no scripwriting class. WHEE!!

Responses before Assignment Update


To Nick, I used my handbag today. Which as you know, is normally anathema to me. Bleh.

Serge... Be nice.

Because it's rare enough to warrant a posting

Business skirts. Fun, but seriously impractical. No place to put my wallet and phone.

Then again, I'm saving the denim skirt for tomorrow's Shah Alam reporting. Bleh.

Like someone else I know, I don't really use the Internet to ask for charity and the like, considering that a lot of these cases are frauds. This is not one of them, however.

Please help her, if you can. I certainly will, as soon as I get the money for it.



Thursday, September 08, 2005


WHEEE!!! No more craziness for another week.

Some more silly stuff

When I said that I over-rationalised, I meant it. Sometimes when I say something, the reasoning behind it appears from nowhere in my head, but I won't tell people because it may seem complicated.

EG: Yesterday I was talking to Serge about being ticklish and I mentioned that I don't really like it. Serge, I didn't like it because it means losing control, and losing control is scary for me because of some of the items on that challenge list I passed to you the other day.


Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Q B brought up

If a guy, after chatting with you and learning more about you, in the space of a few days/weeks, suddenly starts saying that he loves you, it means either:

1. He's a keeper and he REALLY DOES love you.

2. He's messing with you.

I'm leaning with the first.

One of my few crappy days

Today was not really a good day. Spent the whole morning in the editing lab doing video capturing, and finished my lecture commentary quite late, entering PR late.

Then before the class ended, Bong came in to 'tell us' about the Kancil awards. He barged in, no apologies to Vaneetha or the person who was speaking. I suspect that it was the lovely two females in the back who suggested it to him. Then when he talked he was quite loud and booming.

After that I rushed around like a madwoman trying to finish off the lecture commentaries, only to find out that the photocopier was out, so I ended up scanning and printing the cover sheet instead. Saved about 50 cents. :p

Then I went to class to find out that she was on leave. *Makes a face*

Was angry, ranted off in SMS to a friend who called back, made me blush (you know who you are, and THANK YOU for listening to me rant!), did a bit of editing... By the time we were through with the first few edits, I was feeling much more in control. Perhaps when the geek is in the element, she gets things done and feels much better about it. ^_^

But I stayed in a skirt longer than I wanted to. I ended up coming home to drive my brother to the phone shop, picking up my mom and then accompanying her to the doctor's before heading off to the night market. Came home at about nine, took a nice bath, had dinner, and then updated. Whee!!

Taken from Tai Ka Che's journal

You are a Samurai.
You are full of honour and value respect. You
are not really the stereotypical hero, but you
do fight for good. Just in your own way. For
you, it is most certainly okay to kill an evil
person, if it is for justice and peace. You
also don't belive in mourning all the time and
think that once you've hit a bad stage in life
you just have to get up again. It's pointless
to concentrate on emotional pain and better to
just get on with everything. You also are a
down to earth type of person and think before
you act. Impulsive people may annoy you

Main weapon: Sword
Quote: "Always do the right thing.
This will gratify some people and astonish the
rest" -Mark Twain
Facial expression: Small smile

What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla

Very quick random update

I think I may wear this denim skirt more often. It's comfy to run in.

*Runs off for class*

Wearing skirts

I'm wearing a denim skirt for the heck of it.

Matched with a sleeveless/short collared form-fitting pink blouse.

Eat your hearts out. Pic may be up... Or not. *Evil grin*

EDIT: Wearing denim skirts after they've been washed and left to hang in the cupboard for more than 2 years is not a good idea. Comfy though. :p

Monday, September 05, 2005

Last mad update for the day

My Gaian Avie! Whee!!!

What constitutes a Geek to me :p (Yes, I'm bored)

1. Wear glasses. Or have some sort of sight impediment that came about from either reading too much or looking at the computer screen. (Easiest sign of geekiness)

2. When someone says silicon, your first thoughts have nothing to do with the female anatomy.

3. You've used a Mac and you loved it. Or:

3a. You know and love Linus Torvald.

3b. You swear by Firefox.

4. You're familiar with the following names; Isaac Asimov, Marion Zimmer Bradley, David and Leigh Eddings, Tom Clancy, etc.

4a. When people say that fantasy and sci-fi books should be shelved together you get the urge to smack them.

4b. You know RA Salvatore.

5. In relation to 4, you have read at least 2 books on coding (computer languages only, doesn't matter whether it's C++ or HTML, Java or whatever) and understood at least 75% of the books combined.

6. You have played any 3 RPG games (bonus points if it's Final Fantasy) to it's ending at least THRICE.

7. No connection makes you a druggie.

8. You'd die without computers.

9. You look as though you should have spent more time outdoors rather than indoors.

10. You understand jargon.

Me and chocolate

Should not go together in the morning with a large serving. It makes me sleepy.

I shall now work on getting a keyboard face.


The PG-13 Version of Serge's Challenge

1. I love Malaysia, but I can’t stand politicians, especially Najib.

2. I do not like Jeff Ooi. He’s not impartial enough.

3. I’m of legal age as of this year, but I still live with my parents and I have no job. Yes, I’m a student.

4. Despite the fact that I can probably tell you basics of a computer, I’m more of an Internet geek.

5. My neopet is a Purple Shoyru named Seruling, after the mother of one of my characters.

6. My Gaian Avatar has a fox tail and ears. I’m realistic enough to know that if I got them in real life, they would interfere with my movements greatly.

7. On the note that I’m a geek, I date geeks. Most of my male companions tend to wear glasses, speak with jargon, or have at least one piece of equipment that just screams, “Geeky!!”

8. I’ll cheat a lot. No, not in studies, but shortcuts. If there’s a simpler way to do things, I will.

9. Extension to 8: I’ll do more than one thing at a time if I think I can get away with it. This applies to dates and pseudo-dates.

10. My favourite authors are Marion Zimmer Bradley and the Eddings.

11. Working in a bookstore has spoiled me. Now I want staff discounts always.

12. I love books. So much so that I can get mental orgasms from handling them. Old books especially. (Heck! That happened when I went to the Islamic Arts Museum and saw some really old books… so old that they were bound at the spine with STRINGS. And I squeed).

13. I do not like Dan Brown. The DaVinci Code was a huge rip-off and full of erroneous facts.

14. When I have too much free time, I start imagining scenarios where my friends come into my life and are impressed with my ‘other identity’- alter ego.

15. My alter ego is my muse named Naoko.

16. Extension to 14: Yes, I’m an attention whore.

17. I roleplay so frequently now that I’m starting to talk like my characters to a certain extent.

18. My muses are my characters.

19. I like my keyboard to have sounds when I type. It feels old-fashioned and productive.

20. I read manga and squeal in real life, when I come across characters worthy of being fangirled.

21. Extension to 20: I’m starting to fangirl people in real life. Luckily, most are taller than me and I rarely have the space to glomp them. Saizer notwithstanding. So I squee.

22. My IM conversations normally have me hugging people. In real life, I rarely do, as I’m afraid the hugs could be taken the wrong way.

23. I’m short. At 5ft 4.

24. I used to have okay-sized breasts, but due to drastic weight loss I’ve gone back to my pre-Stella Days. *Sniff*

25. I’m a Catholic.

26. I have about 70 writing items in my stories folder alone. 90% are not even halfway finished.

27. The first piece of writing that I completed was a fanfiction piece. A Mary Sue piece about Trunks. This was followed by one about the Power Rangers.

28. I started writing at 12. Mainly because all my other classmates were doing so.

29. I’m slightly homophobic.

30. The scar on my left eyebrow was received when I played “Catching” with a childhood friend. It freaked my friend out more that it did me. :p

31. I like to talk. About nothing at all.

32. I’m a tomboy.

33. I have, (and I just counted) about ten articles of clothing in my cupboard that might be considered girlish i.e. skirts-related.

34. I do not like skirts. Not a lot. They may make me feel feminine, but they are very impractical as well.

35. I cannot resist writing/language challenges. Hence this post.

36. I randomly profess my love for people when they’ve done something fantastic. Case in point? Friend who introduced me to Fire Emblem.

37. Piracy in my opinion rocks! However, there should be a better way to get software.

38. I am a firm believer that once you’ve made your choices, they cannot be undone.

39. My motto in life is: “Choices made cannot be undone. Unless you’re using a computer. Then hit Ctrl+Z, DAMNIT!”

40. I’m an inconsistent person. I cannot make up my mind when I’m with someone.

41. I’m afraid of offending others so much that I’ll bend over backwards to accommodate them.

42. If I think you’re being an idiot, I’ll say so to your face. Unless you’re a total stranger. Then I’ll just be snarky.

43. I only started sleeping with soft toys about three years ago.

44. My room resembles a war zone. No, I’m not a neat person.

45. The same goes for my mind. I have lots of useless trivia in my head.

46. I tend to try to solve things even though they don’t want me to.

47. I over-rationalise things.

48. I love chocolate. To bits.

49. I meow like an actual cat. This came from trying to play with the cats behind my grandmother’s old home.

50. I’m very immature. I still act like a child at times, though I do not throw tantrums.

51. I run away from things. I’m loyal to those who’ve earned it, but when it’s me facing it I try to avoid it.

52. The above is the reason why a lot of people have thought that I’m a very sweet and innocent (well, maybe not all) but ‘nice’ girl.

53. I am a mainstream person. Yes, I like boybands, I read popular mainstream books (which is how I fell into reading The DaVinci Code).

54. I’m a fan of buffets.

55. Despite 80, I do not put on weight from eating a lot. Fast metabolism and all.

56. When I’m bored and I have pen and paper, I start writing random stories.

57. I get high off sugar. Or, as some say, sugar gets high on me.

58. I like eating ebikko and pasta.

59. I create pups for Sages on the spur of the moment. Simply because I can.

60. My muses live in my head. However, some of them are NOT personifications of aspects of myself. Sukina, the shy, elegant one, is an example.

61. Kurama from Yuyu Hakusho was my first bishie love. This was followed by Cho Hakkai of Saiyuki and Satoshi Hiwatari/Hikari of DNAngel. That should give you an inkling of type of guys I like.

62. I’m an Eurasian who looks Chinese when I speak English, Chinese to the Malay people I talk to, and Malay to the Chinese people. Anak Malaysia woot!

63. I do not find poetry very interesting. The kinds I like tend to be storylike.

64. I love FireFox. Mainly because of the tab options.

65. That said, I think Google is the best thing since Air.

66. I’m such a forgetful person that I can forget what was said to me three seconds after it’s was repeated… For the third time.

67. Oddly enough, I can remember conversations held like three years ago in vivid detail, including positions of speakers, venue, probable DAY and time. (Which explains why I have a lot of useless information in my head).

68. I love going to the beach more than the mountainside.

69. Once I give my loyalty to someone, nothing can change it unless you betray me.

70. Hair colour: dark brown to auburn, depending on the light.

71. I keep my hair long to irritate my mother.

72. I was raised by my grandmother until I was 15.

73. I do not like handbags as I’ve been snatch thieved before. So I stuff things in my pockets. Hence the reason why I prefer wearing pants.

74. (FINALLY!) I sleep like a log at times

Sunday, September 04, 2005

This shall be sparkled later....

Wild Energy

Karada jyuu michiafureru yasei no energy
Tagirasete ima tokihanate
Kiseki ga okoru (atarashii sekai)
Mou hitori jyanai

Nani yatte mo odoroku hodo
Mawari ni tsuite yukezu
Muchuu ni nareru mono wo mitsuketemo
Tataki nomesareru

Sore de ii to omotteta
Sore ga futsu datta
Deguchi ga mitsukaranai mama
Arukuno wo yameru
(Dare mo imasen ka?)

Nanairo ni moretekuru hikari wo sagashi
Itsumademo sora wo miteiru
Doko kara ka aoi tori tondekuru koto
Omoinagara mado wo aketeru
Nani mo okoronai (shizuka na sekai)
Tatta hitori datta

Sasai na jijou ni nagasareru mama
Itsushika machi wo dete
Dare ka ni nozomareru koto mo nakerya
Nozomu koto mo wasure

Zutto mattaira na jinsei
Sono mattada naka de
Seiten no inazuma no youni
Kimi ga arawareru
(Kokoro ga furuete)

Karada chuu michiafureru yasei no energy
Tagirasete ima tokihanate
Mayowazuni sono mama de yukeba iin da to
Kimi ga boku ni oshiete kureta
Kiseki ga okoru (atarashii sekai)
Mou hitori jyanai

Karada chuu michiafureru yasei no energy
Tagirasete ima tokihanate
Chippoke na sekai de kurushimu koto wa nai
Garakuta ni umaru door wo hirake
Kiseki ga okoru (mabushii sekai)
Mou hitori jyanai

Mayowazuni sono mama de yukeba iin da to
Kimi ga boku ni oshiete kureta
Saa dete yukou
Mou hitori jyanai


Brimming wild energy inside the body
Overflowing, unfasten and release it now
A miracle happens (a new world)
I'm not alone anymore

Whatever I do, surprisingly
I can't keep up with my surroundings
Even if I have found my calling
It would be knocked down

Thinking that it's okay
That it's just normal
While not finding a way out
I'm giving up trying altogether
(Anyone around?)

Looking for a rainbow
I'm always watching the sky
Picturing a blue bird fly to me from somewhere
I open the window
Nothing happens (a quiet world)
It's just me, all alone

Swept along by petty reasons
Before I'm aware of it, already I'm out on the street
If there's nobody looking at me
I'd also forget to look at other people

In this always humble life of mine
Right into the midst of it
Just like a flash of lightning in the clear sky
You appear
(My heart shakes)

Brimming wild energy inside the body
Overflowing, unfasten and release it now
Don't hesitate, just go on like that
You told me this
A miracle happens (a new world)
I'm not alone anymore

Brimming wild energy inside the body
Overflowing, unfasten and release it now
In this tiny world, there's nothing to be worried about
Open the door which has been buried in junk
A miracle happens (a dazzling world)
I'm not alone anymore

Don't hesitate, just go on like that
You told me this
So let's get out there
I'm not alone anymore


Damn you, Serge!

I slept late last night completing a challenge he threw me. If you wanna know what it is, drop me a line. I'll give you the link.

Bleh. *Goes back off to bed*

Saturday, September 03, 2005



Wasurenai koi gokoro
Itsumade mo koi gokoro

Kanojo wa itsumo milk tea eki no soba no kissaten de
Atarashii shampoo to rinse soshite, ryokou no keikaku ga wadai
Hanashi wo shitai keredo, yabona seikaku ga barecha mazui

Dou shiyou, hoka no ko ga jyamasuru, konna toki myou ni naka ga ii yo ne
Kore ga onna no rentaikan nanoka, komaru ne Sensei, totemo!

Woo! Sukoshi nagame no kami yurashite, naiteiru ano ko wo mita
Nani kana (nani kana)? Nan nan darou na, baby
Namida kawai ya tsukiaitai
Matsumoto ni shoudan shiyou ka? < (^_^) >
Demo tabun hiyakasareru kara yame tokou!

Dou shiyou jugyou no naiyou wa konna toki zenzen tsukaemasen
Kibishii ne jinsei to iu no wa, naka naka Sensei, totemo!
Dekireba isshoni odoritai, kirakira to hikari wo abite futari
Hontou wa dare ka suki na hito ga iru koto shitteru keredo!

Dou shiyou umaku ikanai koi, konna toki motto otona ni naritai
Dare mo ga nayanda koto nano ka, mattaku Sensei (Sensei!)

Tsuyoku dakiatta nakama tomo itsuka wa hanareteyuku kamo shirenai kedo
Nidoto wa modoranai jikan wo waratte utatte

Zutto wasurenai itsumade mo ano koi
Nakusanai mune wo tataku itami wo
Asekaki iki hazu maze hashiru hibi wa mada ima mo tsuzuku!

Wasurenai koi gokoro
Itsumade mo koi gokoro


I can't forget, heart in love
Never ever forget, heart in love

She always has milk tea at the coffee shop beside the station
And she talks about new shampoo and rinse and plans for school trip
I really want to talk to her, but it's no good if she discover my boorish character

What should I do? The other girls came to interrupt, at this point, any idea would be great
Is this the so-called women's intuition, I'm troubled, Sensei, very much!

Woo! When her mid-length hair swayed aside, I saw that she was in tears
What's the matter (what's the matter)? What's happening with you, baby?
Even her tears are cute, I'd really like to know her better
Should I ask Matsumoto for advice? < (^_^) >
But I'd probably be laughed at, so I'd better not!

What should I do, at this time, I can't use school lessons as topic
Say, isn't life hard, pretty hard, Sensei, very hard !
If possible, I'd like to dance with her, the two of us glittering in the shimmering lights
Even as I know that she seems to be fond of someone else

What should I do, about this love that won't go smoothly,
At this point, I wish I could be more like an adult
Is this something that troubles everyone too, sensei (Sensei!)

Even though I don't know when my best of friends will all drift away
Let's laugh and sing for the time that will never return

I shall never forget that love
I didn't cry even though the pain was knocking in the heart
Blurred hurried days when I run and bounce sweatily are here to stay even until now!

I can't forget, heart in love
Never ever forget, heart in love

Friday, September 02, 2005

There's a reason

Why I cannot stand certain lecturers.

In this case, I just found out that I left an interesting and important class early to attend the tute of the other class way too early. It's in about 10 minutes, but I am too pissed off right now to go back into the first class.

I hate that lecturer.

Thursday, September 01, 2005


I missed CF today because of shooting and He repays me by giving me a drink (literally) when I need it the most.

Guilty as charged. *Sweatdrops*

Of silliness and craziness


Moyamoya shiteru no ga iya nara futon wo kande kangaete
Nanka aitsu ni kitai kajyou nan jya nai no

Hito no kokoro wa doushite mo nani ka tari nai keredo
Sokon toko umeru beki na no wa
Koibito jya nai, oyade mo nai... Nee, sou deshou?

Love me, kechitte nai de
Boku wa kitto ai wo motto daseru
I love you, ogoraseteru dake jya
Sono uchi dare mo inaku naru yo

Tsugou ii mono dake hippari dashite jibun no un no warusa wo
Soitsu ni bettori na suru kuse nai kai
(Hey, watch your step, darling?)
Yaritakunai koto bakari ga tsugitsugi to mitsukaru keredo
Shoukyohou de ikeru koto mo arurashii
Sono uchi maa, nan toka naru... Hey, sou darou?

Love me, piripiri suru nara
Sugu ni mutto suru no gutto taete
I love you, ai wo hakidashite
Sore demo katto kita nara Baby, let's dance

Love me, kechitte nai de
Boku wa kitto ai wo motto daseru
I love you, kokoro yurushite
Akiru made daki atta nara naosara
Let's give it away, kenashite nai de
Tama nya umi mo yama mo hito mo homeruyo
Nan chuu love! Jibun no shin kara
Kimochi yoku naritakerya ima dashite


I hate being confused, biting my futon (Japanese bedding) and thinking hard
Have I somehow expected too much from her?
A person's heart is always lacking of something
An empty space that must be filled
Not by lover, not by parents, say, isn't that true?

Love me, don't be stingy now
I shall give you much more of my love too
I love you, just by letting you win a bit
You're looking down on everyone

Only getting things that get by, it's all because of my bad luck
So please can't you just simply stick to me
(Hey, watch your step, darling?)
Although we found things that we hate coming one after another
But it seems like we can put them away just fine
And until then, we shall come up with something, hey, isn't that right?

Love me, if you're not happy
Turn your easily fired-up energy on and hang in there
I love you, I'm speaking my love out to you
And even then if I still get cut, then Baby, let's dance

Love me, don't be stingy now
I shall give you much more of my love too
I love you, give me your heart
We'll heal better if we embrace each other until we're tired from it
Let's give it away, don't always critize me now
Occasionally pay compliments to the ocean, mountains and people
Love is happening, and it's coming from the centre of my heart
The feeling will get much better soon, surrender yours right now!